Player Profile: Greg Roll

His smooth, effortless swing has been credited with ending the Cold War, lowering the crime rate in New York City, and most recently preventing a swine flu epidemic. Some have said that watching him play softball is like witnessing the birth of Jesus. When he slumps the entire world slumps as witnessed by the global economic crisis.

Birds sit on his window sill and sing to him when he wakes up. School children bring him apples. The Dos Equis most interesting man in the world finds him interesting.

Who is he you ask? He is none other than Greg Roll aka the greatest softball player in the history of mankind. And if you don't believe me just ask him. As a matter of fact ask CNN's Money Magazine. They recently named Baldwin the 25th best place to live in America and it is believed that was largely in part because Greg Roll resides there.

If there is a better softball player, no, better human being on the face of Earth he has yet to come forward. There is Greg Roll and then there is everyone else. There is even a Greg Roll movie set to come out in the Fall entitled "That's How I Roll" with Steve-O cast to play the lead.

ABA is even considering an amendment to league rules that would allow Greg to field a team all by himself. Currently a team must play with at least 8 fielders at all times. This amendment would allow Greg to showcase his extraordinary talents including his blazing speed that makes Usain Bolt look like he's running in slow motion.

The Gamers are truly lucky to have this once in a lifetime talent on their roster.

Please send fan mail for Greg to:

830 Atlantic Avenue
Care of Synergy Gym
Baldwin, NY 11510

**Editor's Note**

I was under no duress whatsoever while writing this article. Greg did not pay me to write this or put me up to this in any way, shape or form. Everything I said in this article is 100% true.



Greg is so good at Softball that MLB is using him to promote their latest video game.